


"You CAN do this" [Moxiety]

by Sammy_is_obsessed



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-07
Updated: 2018-06-07
Packaged: 2019-05-19 05:00:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14867081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sammy_is_obsessed/pseuds/Sammy_is_obsessed
Summary: Virgil stood stiff as a board, staring at his reflection in the mirror with a look of disdain and a hellacious feeling in the pit of his stomach. He looked intensely at the image of himself staring back, loathing the way he looked so out of place and uncertain. He was dressed in a dark purple suit with a black tie on and slate black shoes on. He'd skipped the eye-makeup today, though parting with his eyeshadow was not an easy task. He'd done it though, all for a good cause as this wasn't really the scene for it. Though it was how he felt most times, today was the day where he would be expected to be calm, courageous. Even-keel. But no, that wasn't Virgil, and even on a happy occasion such as this, he was eaten away by self-doubt and fear.He studied himself carefully, though it wasn't as if he was "checking himself out." Ugh, far from it. He wasn't the sort of person to become self-absorbed or bask in their appearance; that seemed to be more princey's forte, but never the less he found it incredibly crucial that he looked as confident and presentable as he could muster.It was Virgil's wedding day – god it felt so weird saying that.





	"You CAN do this" [Moxiety]

(A/N:) Human au. Enjoy this pretty fluffy oneshot.

Third Person P.O.V:

Virgil stood stiff as a board, staring at his reflection in the mirror with a look of disdain and a hellacious feeling in the pit of his stomach. He looked intensely at the image of himself staring back, loathing the way he looked so out of place and uncertain. He was dressed in a dark purple suit with a black tie on and slate black shoes on. He'd skipped the eye-makeup today, though parting with his eyeshadow was not an easy task. He'd done it though, all for a good cause as this wasn't really the scene for it. Though it was how he felt most times, today was the day where he would be expected to be calm, courageous. Even-keel. But no, that wasn't Virgil, and even on a happy occasion such as this, he was eaten away by self-doubt and fear.

He studied himself carefully, though it wasn't as if he was "checking himself out." Ugh, far from it. He wasn't the sort of person to become self-absorbed or bask in their appearance; that seemed to be more princey's forte, but never the less he found it incredibly crucial that he looked as confident and presentable as he could muster.

It was Virgil's wedding day – god it felt so weird saying that. Virgil never thought he was ever going to be lucky enough to get a boyfriend, much less a husband. He'd been close friends with Patton for a few years, silently suffering in the love that grew and grew for the pun-loving man. Of course, Patton would want someone who was as compassionate and emotional, someone soft and kind and friendly all of the time. Someone that wasn't him. He didn't stand a chance.

He really had tried to stop himself from falling Patton, but he just couldn't help it and there was no going back once it had begun. As torturous as it had been getting to be so close to Patton but knowing deep down that he could never have him, he was his best friend and if he could have anything at all, he would take a good friendship. Even if it hurt him dearly, he'd rather have Patton in his life and suffer rather than not have him in it at all. This went on for a long time, as he had decided that he could never come forward about his feelings, his anxieties and fears gripping him tightly. But then something spectacular had happened.

Patton had kissed him.

It had been quick, only a couple of seconds at most but, goddamn it all, that was one of the most magical moments of Virgil's life. They'd been sitting on the sofa at Pat's place watching a movie and the two had been cuddling as Patton was a very touchy-feely guy. Usually, Virgil was about the opposite, but with Pat, he acted a little different, a bit more vulnerable. Sometimes it was hard to tell if that was a good thing or not. When the film had ended the two had been leaning close to each other, so close they could feel each other's breath on their faces, the silence stiffly awkward. Virgil didn't know what had come over his friend but suddenly he'd surged forward the final length between them and closed the gap. Even in the darkened room, Virgil was fairly sure he'd never been so red-in-the-face.

Patton had pulled away quick;y, flicking on the lights to see Virgil staring back with the widest eyes. It had been so fast-paced that he hadn't even gotten a chance to kiss back. Instantly, Patton was sputtering apology after apology about how out of line he had been, and he didn't know where in the world his mind had been before suddenly Virgil had leaned forwards and shut him up with a stronger, more heated kiss. 

Virgil had never been an "in the moment" kind of a guy who could just do something so emotional, so spontaneously and his anxiety would have normally held him back from anything of that sort even if he wanted to, but with Patton going for it when he was so certain he could never feel the same way, he gained a momentarily supply of confidence. And this time Patton hadn't pulled away, hadn't gone stiff but rather closed his eyes and clung tightly to Virgil, pouring every ounce of himself into the kiss.

The moment they broke apart after many minutes of being practically glued to each other, panting heavily and desperate for air Virgil had let out a breathy whisper into Patton's ear that would change everything.

"I love you." He knew it was extremely hasty to say so this quickly, but in the heat of the moment he couldn't help but confess this hidden truth. And the thing that shocked him the most, perhaps, was the fact that Patton had said it back.

It didn't take long for the pair to start calling each other their boyfriend and get sickeningly cute real quick. Though Virgil wasn't exactly known for being the type to be gushy and lovey-dovey, Patton just happened to bring out that in him, hell, sometimes it felt like he'd turned into a different person. Regardless, it felt like the two were making up for lost time, for all of the efforts that they had exhorted in order to hide their true affections. Each kiss felt like Virgil needed it as desperately as oxygen, each embrace was as if Patton was shielding him from all of the pain and the anger that resided in the world. If he thought that he'd loved him before, Virgil was somehow even more far-gone now. He really had lost it for Patton Paternalian.

And even though he was happy with him, like, insanely happy, it couldn't take away his concerns or diminish his anxiety. Patton was way too good for him, he was painfully aware of that. Something was always bound to go amiss. It didn't feel like the relationship could last forever, surely Patton would grow tired of him and move on to someone new who was more fitting for him. He tried his absolute hardest to make sure Patton knew just how appreciated he was and how much he loved and needed him. At times it was exhausting, constantly feeling the need to prove himself a capable partner and one deserving of Patton. Each time they fought, which was hardly anything at all, Virgil was sure it was going to end in a breakup, that he'd crossed an uncrossable line. He always feared the end would come.

Except it never did.

If anything, somehow, the couple grew stronger. Their love ran deeper. They became more dependent on each other and their connection became even more intense. A full three years had passed, and they were still together, still going strong. He'd attained the love he never thought he'd deserve.

Their dear friends Logan and Roman were already married by this point, having gotten engaged only about seven months after beginning dating. Though it was quick, it came as no surprise to anyone. Roman was a very passionate "every moment count" kind of guy, which though tiring was actually something Virgil had always secretly admired about him. Logan and Roman seemed like they had practically hated each other for a long time, bringing a long reign of tension to their friend group. But when push came to shove, they were crazy for one another. Though they'd fought a lot and had an imbalance, they were too blind to see just how in love they were, much like Virgil and Patton had been, he realized. Though they started dating after he and his fiancé, Virgil wasn't the least bit surprised when he saw a plain silver engagement ring adorning Logan's finger – though Roman insisted that he would've gone way fancier if his lover's taste wasn't so professional and bland. Logan had seemed very shaken up for a while after that, as he was not a fast-paced person and he hadn't expected them to get married so soon. But he loved Roman dearly, even if he had been bone-headed for proposing publicly and making him melt and cry in front of all those people, and so he'd said yes.

Virgil wasn't sure if that had been his inspiration to propose to Pat or if it had just been that gnawing feeling that if he didn't do it then, he would never be brave enough to. He didn't want to chance to lose him and though he was a nervous wreck, he'd purchased the ring, written a heartfelt speech.

And gone and fucked everything up.

It did not go as planned, no not nearly. Virgil had forgotten most of his speech, dropped the ring and it had nearly rolled away, and cried so hard he'd almost had a panick attack. It was truly a miserable experience and would surely be proof that he would no longer be any good in a relationship. And even with his puffy eyes and trembling form, Patton had retrieved the ring, encased Virgil in a bone-crushing hug and said "YES!" about a million times over with tears welling in his eyes.

Needless to say, Virgil was stoked. He was marrying the man of his dreams, going to spend the rest of his life with the person who he was so madly in love with and things were looking up more and more. Unfortunately, right now he was a whole lot less stoked.

As he stared in the mirror he felt himself grimace, his heart beating wildly. The only thought that entered his mind was, I CAN'T DO THIS.

"What's with the long face, Charlie Frown?" Virgil whirled around to see Roman standing in the doorway, already in his suite and ready to go. It seemed a little silly when he thought about the fact that Roman was his best man. He loved the guy to pieces no matter how insufferable he could be, but Logan wouldn't be a better option. He could be calm and rational and keep him even-keeled without making a big fuss. But if that had been the case then Patton's best man would've been Roman, and lord knows that could've been a different kind of a mess. With those two being more emotionally-charged that dressing room could've easily become a madhouse and they might've gotten distracted and not gotten ready in time. There were just too many variables and thus, they were here and now.

Virgil clenched nervously clenched his fists as Roman entered the room. He was clad in a stark white suit, the tie a deep red color and the rose pinned to him being of the same color. His brown hair was swooped back effortlessly, and Virgil hated that his groomsman probably looked better than him.

"Oh Virgil, you look simply magnificent! Just like a prince," Roman cooed fondly, placing a gentle hand on Virgil's shoulder. And truly hearing such a sincere compliment from someone like Roman, who wasn't one to say something so endearing on the spot, was a special moment but it didn't stand to ease Virgil's concerns and the groom flinched. Roman's eyebrows were suddenly knit with worry as he retracted his hand. "Panic! At the Everywhere, you're shaking, and you don't look very merry considering it's your wedding day," he noted carefully. "Are you quite alright?" Virgil sucked in a breath, shaking his head and casting his gaze downwards.

"No," Virgil spoke, voice trembling and uneven, "No I'm not. Ro... I don't think I can do this."

"What in the haecceity-heck, five abs one peck?" God, Virgil hated how strangely absurd Roman could be sometimes. Virgil sighed, not saying anything and so Roman continued. "I don't understand the problem here. You're marrying Patton, who loves you more than I love Disney, which I'll have you know is a lot." Virgil suddenly turned to him, his face even paler than usual. Roman winced, seeing his friend in such a lowly state. His entire frame shook, panic in his eyes.

"Roman, I-I ... I-I'm scared." He hated how weak his voice sounded, the way it quivered and the way his body shook. Roman sighed deeply before extending his arms for a hug. Virgil hesitated for a moment before stepping forward and allowing himself to be enclosed in Roman's comforting embrace. Roman held on tight, trying his best to comfort the emo nightmare.

"Oh, V, look at me," he said, commanding Virgil's gaze in a sincere but assertive voice, "You can do this. I know you can. That puffball loves you to the moon and back, and I know you love him just as much too. You guys were simply meant to be ~," he said, singing the last few words and earning a dramatic eye-roll. "But seriously, you got this. I have faith in you." Virgil took a deep shuddery breath.

"Thanks, princey ..." he mumbled.

"Anytime, Virgil," Roman said, a sincere smile pressed to his lips, "Now, let's get some eyeshadow on you before you head out there because you've got to get going soon, Mr." Virgil blinked.

"But ... I thought you didn't like the eyeshadow? Said it was too emo?" Roman sighed, rolling his eyes but there was still a hint of a smile present on his lips.

"Yeah, well, I never said I liked it," he defended hastily before continuing, "But it's your thing, and I'd hate to see you any less comfortable than you need to be." In this moment a tiny, tiny bit of Virgil's worries had died down and were replaced with mushy feelings that Roman had ignited. Their friendship really had improved from how it used to be, back when they constantly expressed that they didn't like each other and wanted nothing to do with one another. They truly had progressed, and Virgil would always be grateful for that.

"Thanks, Ro. But ..." he trailed off, shrugging. "I dunno. It's not very formal."

"Oh, to hell with that," Roman said, his voice passionate, "It's your fairy-tail ending, and as such you should be able to do whatever you desire. Do not let anything hold you back, my friend!" He cried, smiling wistfully. Virgil chuckled, getting out the makeup and beginning to apply it to his under eyes.

Yeah, let nothing hold me back. besides my crippling anxiety, of course, he thought to himself a little bleakly. After a couple more, minutes of a pep talk and Roman being his over romantic enthusiastic self, it was signaled that it was time to commence the wedding, and Virgil's worries were returned to him full force.

"Come now, Virgil. It will be fine. It's going to be magical, I promise," he said, a look of thoughtfulness bright in his eyes. Virgil couldn't help but smile. Roman really was mad for Logan, and though the more logical man would "never phrase it so strange," he was too. Virgil was glad to see Roman as happy as he was. The guy has always been a very romantic person, in constant longing for a partner and it was clear that he was lonely for a long time. But he had Logan now, and he'd never been in a better place.

Virgil was about to be in the same place and he was terrified. If his proposal hadn't even gone as planned, how was he supposed to say his vows without breaking? He just wanted it to be the next day, curled up in bed with their wedding bands on their fingers. Maybe Patton would make some cookies and Virgil would help him. He could picture the kisses they could share, the sweet taste of batter on their lips. It would be perfect. They weren't going on some major honeymoon but decided that spending some quiet time with each other was enough for them. But right now, everything was a big deal, and everyone was counting on him to give the best speech and not start sobbing, most of all himself.

By the time the organ began playing Roman looped his and Virgil's arms together as he ushered him into the large room packed with all of their friends and family in chairs set in rows. There seemed to be about a million and a half roses, all white, light blue and purple. Truly, it was beautiful. Virgil stood beside the minister, Roman on his other side, his hand ghosting over Virgil's, trying to silently tell him that it would be alright.

Then, Virgil's breath caught in his throat. His heart skipped a beat. His eyes went wide.

The door had opened and in came Patton looking like about the most beautiful person in the whole wide world. He was dressed in a powder blue suit, his tie and shoes an angelic white to match the single rose pinned to him. The large window light up the room and basked his face in the afternoon sunlight, making him look somehow even more majestic than he already did. The same white flowers were knotted together to halo his head in a crown of roses and extending from this was a sheer veil that covered his face that could still almost entirely be seen through, his cheeks rosy and his smile was wide. Virgil could hardly breathe, feeling his knees wobble unsteadily before Roman, as subtly as he could manage, grabbed Virgil's trembling hand and positioned him upright.

"Can't have you falling down on your wedding day, now can we, Virgil?" He whispered softly, leaning close to Virgil's ears through his eyes were trained on something else. Logan.

Logan walked beside Patton, holding his hand dearly and looking straight ahead while Patton's eyes seemed to be everywhere, trying to absorb every bit of the beautiful display. Logan was clothed in a dark navy-blue suit, the tie around his neck is about the same blue as Patton's own suit, his hair combed neatly and shoes a coal black. He walked down the aisle beside Patton with their hands clasped tightly, Patton's glasses-framed eyes already seeming to be shinning with tears as the music wavered. Though Logan was looking head on out of the corner of his eyes it was obvious that he was looking at Roman, his cheeks flushing slightly when he finally did take a full look at him, not that he'd ever admitted to it. The music faded before disappearing completely once the two had made it completely down the aisle, and oh dear god, Virgil was sure he wouldn't last long.

Patton was all smiles, grinning widely as Logan positioned himself on the right side, next to Patton, while Roman still occupied the right with Virgil. And dear god, Virgil can't take his eyes off of Patton. It feels almost as if he'd stumbled upon the set of a Disney movie and Patton had been cast as the dashing prince who was staged to save the damsel in distress and be a hero – not that Virgil doesn't have some serious issues with how some of those dudes are portrayed in those films. But the thing was, Patton was his prince, and that was mind-boggling. 

The minister went on to begin the ceremony, the room abuzz with cheer and excitement. Joan and Talon are seated next to each other, their fingers laced together as the smile fondly at their friends. Valarie, Jo, Terrance, Camden, and Jamal are there too as well as some other good friends and all of Virgil and Roman's family. That should be the thing making Virgil so nervous, the fact that they're being watched by everyone important in his life, but that isn't it. Not to say that it isn't a little nerve-racking, but what's really making his skin crawl is Patton. Because, goddamn it, he just loves him so much and he wants this to go perfectly but the tears are already pricking at his eyes. Patton leans over, mouthing that Virgil looks "perfect", causing the emo to turn a billion shades redder. When the minister goes silent giving Virgil a glance he clears his throat, trying to blink away the tears.

Since when did I get so emotional???? Virgil wonders to himself, bombarded with so many feelings.

"I ... I have so much to say, Pat. Really ... I do," he says, his watery eyes meeting Patton's, which seem to be equally watery, not that Virgil really notices. Patton smiles encouragingly, softly and sweetly. "And ... and I – I want to say it all, b-but if I'm being honest here, a-and I am, I don't know how much I'm g-going to last up here," he says honestly, fiddling with his collar. 

"That's okay, Virgey," Patton whispers, his smile not fading in the least bit. Virgil gives a half grin, taking a deep breath before grabbing Patton's hand and entwining their fingers. Jesus, his hands are shaking so badly.

"Patton, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me, hands down. God ... you're so fucking special." Virgil clasps a hand over his mouth, eyes going a little wider as he realizes he just said "fucking" in his wedding vows. He's fairly sure he hears Joan whoop in response. Honestly, he would expect nothing less from them. "Uh-sorry," he says, glancing around the room nervously before directing his gaze back to Patton. "But, I ... I just want to say that I love you with all of the heart I didn't even know I had. You ...... you always are there for me, to help me and to ... to make me feel wanted. And you're so beautiful. God, look at you, baby. You look like the prettiest person I've ever seen." Patton flushes and suddenly Virgil's full-on water-works, tears streaming down his face as he sniffles, trying to soldier on. "Because you are the prettiest person I've ever seen, i-inside and out. You're so good, Pat ...... so good, and I know I don't d-deserve you, b-but I've got you, and I don't e-ever want to lose that. I ... I love you, Pat. I r-r-really, really love you ..."

That was about the stopping point as Virgil's voice was drowned out by the sobs that racked his body, leaving Roman to give him a sympathetic pat on the back, signaling that he'd done a good job.

"That was lovely, V," Roman whispered quietly, but Virgil wasn't listening. He was trying to steady his breathing and allow Patton his turn, Patton who only now realized was crying nearly as hard, a wobbly smile still present on his face.

"Oh, Virgey, t-that's so, s-so, sweet, sunshine. I ...." He swallowed, fresh tears welling in his eyes, "I love you too. So-so much. You're w-what makes me want to g-get up in the morning. W-what ... what makes me happy. You m-make me h-happy. You're everything I-I've ever wanted a-and I'm the one who feels like I-I don't deserve you sometimes. You're p-perfect to me." Patton shuddered, his reddened face dampened with tears. The minister smiled earnestly at the affectionate couple whose hands are clasped so tightly as they sniffle, the tears rushing down their flushed cheeks. Honestly, he isn't sure if he's ever seen such a beautiful couple together, their compassion speaking volumes about who they are. He continued on until the ceremony wound to a close and he asked the couple the major rom-com question, the one that left everyone in the audience on the edge of their seats.

"Do you, Patton Paternalian, take Virgil Sanders to be your lawfully wedded husband till death do you part?" Patton nodded up and down quickly, smiling and crying.

"Y-yes." The minister grinned.

"Good. And do you, Virgil Sanders, take Patton Paternalian to be your lawfully wedded husband till death do you part?" 

"G-god yes," Virgil muttered, his eyes red and vision blurry. 

"Then by the power vested in me - by the state of Florida - I pronounce you husband and husband. You may kiss." And it only took about half of a millisecond before they collapsed against each other, squishing their tear-streaked faces together and kissing each other with so much love. The crowd erupted with cheers, Joan giving a hearty, "FUCK YA!" as their sentiment. The couple giggled, still pressing close and never wanting to let go.

=+=

By the evening the two are sitting up in bed, clad in their pajamas, their suits having since been put away. The festivities have ended and they are worn out from crying and dancing into the night. This seemed to be the one time that Virgil didn't really care how goofy he looked dancing because he was with Patton. He was with his husband. He didn't just make it bearable, he made it perfect.

It's late, and Virgil glanced at the clock beside the bed with weary eyes, noticing it's past midnight. He reached over to turn off the lamp and plucked Patton's glasses off of his face to set them down, curling close to him in the darkness. Patton immediately threw his arms around Virgil and held tight, pressing a tender, sleepy kiss to his shoulder.

"Today was a good day," Patton remarked in a tired voice, casually as if it was just any other day. Virgil chuckled, turning over so that he can face Patton in the darkness, kissing his lips softly for a moment.

"Yeah, Pat. It was," and even in the dim light, he can see Patton smile.

"You looked so pretty, Virgey. 'Course, you always look pretty. My beautiful, beautiful husband." Patton giggled sleepily, his jumbled, repetitive words evident that he's fading fast. Virgil is too, though, and is about ready to fall asleep. 

"Thanks, Pat. You looked so beautiful too. Let's go to sleep now, hm? We'll talk in the morning." Patton nodded against him, laying his head on Virgil's shoulder. 

"Okay, Virgil. Goodnight. I looooove you," he said, extending the 'o' as far as it would stretch. A content smile spread across Virgil's face as he pressed a final kiss to Patton's check before shutting his tired eyes.

"Night, Patton. I love you too." From there was the quiet, the gentle, loving kind that was the special kind of silence that doesn't feel awkward or uncomfortable. It's just natural and in some strange way, sort of beautiful. Because Virgil is calm now. There's no chaos around him, nothing to worry about. He's here and it's peaceful and it's just them. He's home, and there's nowhere he'd rather be.

=+=

(A/N:) I'm actually moderately proud of this, it turned out pretty okay. I'll see you next time.

\- Sammy Sam


End file.
